Because you know I love you, I thought I best lend you a paw this Xmas. So to help you retain your sanity and get you through this silly season, the Mental Health Association NSW has some useful tips to keep you going.
Managing relationships at Christmas
Feelings of stress, anxiety and depression are common during the festive season. If nothing else, reassure yourself that these feelings are normal. Things you can try to reduce the amount of unpleasant feelings experienced on Christmas Day and throughout the holiday season are:
Have realistic expectations of yourself and others. Don’t expect miracles, if you and certain family members bicker all year long, you can be sure there will be tension at Christmas lunch too. Christmas isn’t a time to address long-term conflict. Try to let go of hard feelings at least for that one day, it will help you get through the holidays and my may even enjoy yourself.
Pick who you spend time with and talk to. Do things with people you feel most comfortable with. Going on a long walk with a favourite relative will help you get away and spend time with the person you would most like to.
Avoid known triggers. If politics or religion is a touchy subject, don’t discuss it. If someone else brings up the topic, use distraction and move onto another subject. If there’s a particular person you clash with, create some safe distance and sit next to someone else at lunch or dinner.
Plan fun things to do. Family members are less likely to get into arguments if they are involved in after lunch activities such as board games or a cricket match in the backyard. Plan for something to do as a group and focus on things you enjoy doing.
Take time out with friends. If you’re not used to spending all your time with the same people, it’s important to try and get a balance. You could still spend time with family but also arrange some days or nights out with your friends and give yourself and others a break. Plan ahead.
Set aside time for yourself. This can be something as simple as going for a short walk, or having a nap. Having some ‘me time’ to get away from it all will help you relax.
Look after your physical health. Getting enough sleep, keeping up your regular physical activity
routine, using relaxation techniques, and eating and drinking with moderation will help give you the stamina to get through the demands of the season.
Christmas is lonely for many—spread the cheer
People of all ages can enjoy Christmas with others, but there are many who find it to be a really lonely time. When family and friends get together it can be hard for those people who are on their own.
If you know someone who will be alone over Christmas, one of the kindest things you can do is get in touch. Even if it’s just for a chat on Christmas morning, a hello, or an invitation to have a cake in the afternoon, it can make a massive difference to their experience of the festive season.
Helping out others and doing random acts of kindness for someone will also lift your spirits if you are experienced festive stress. Consider volunteering in the days leading up to Christmas or donating to charity.
If you don’t have close family or friends to spend Christmas with, you could also consider doing a call out to other friends, or colleagues who are also not spending time with family. You’ll be surprised how many people are separated from family and friends during this time of year. Get together on Christmas Day to do something different from what you’d do with family—such as a picnic in the backyard, a day at the beach or a themed party at someone’s house. If you are alone on Christmas Day, remember that it’s just one day out of 365, and try to do something enjoyable and special just for you.
Festive stress is normal
Remember just because some things are ‘supposed’ to be fun and festive around holiday time, doesn’t mean you have to be.
Accept that the festive season is a stressful time and allow yourself to have feelings about it. Remind yourself that the feelings will not stay forever, and you have the ability to make things better. When you are feeling sad, overwhelmed or stressed, ask yourself ‘What can I do right now to feel better?’
This might involve practicing some of the tips suggested above to reduce relationship stress. It could also mean talking to someone about how you feel and sharing what the season is really like for you.
But above all else, relax and enjoy the time being you.
Anyhow’s until January 2018, may you all have a happy, safe and jolly time. Remember to play nicely with the other children and remember my motto for this Holiday Season…. ‘The more the merrier’ and you know what I mean.
Most of all remembered you are loved.
xoxxo
